Personal Power is important for speaking your authentic truth! Do you use your voice to exert power (or so you think)? When you speak emotionally about something, how do people react? Notice if they are drawn closer to you or navigate away (could be physically or emotionally). If they navigate away, it may be time to take a look at how you voice your opinions.
Listen to your voice. When you are emotionally charged your voice reflects it. It shows up in your tone and pitch. You tone is about your attitude and your pitch is about your emotions.
When you speak while emotionally charged you send a message that you are not in control and therefore have no personal power.
Find your power
Personal power comes from within, not from the external environment. Powerful people do not need to prove their power. They simply walk in it and everyone feels it.
They can separate their own emotions from the issues they face and when they speak, they reflect self-confidence.
You may wish to speak with compassion and mindfulness about the issues at hand without making others feel your emotions or that they are wrong in some way.
How do you implement personal power?
Self-discovery is key. The fact that you are taking the time to read about this is a sign that you are willing to work towards discovering how you do things. Now that, in itself, is a form of personal power.
You can’t change what you don’t acknowledge. We all have our dark sides of our personalities along with our light. Self-discovery is a process of becoming aware of how and why we do the things we are not so proud of. Most of us do not want to believe that we have those parts of ourselves. So we ignore, numb, or project our pain onto others instead of looking within. When you do take that courageous step to self-discovery, do not judge yourself. Instead be proud that you are willing to take this journey of personal growth, transformation and personal power.
When you become aware of your tone and pitch, ask yourself, “How did I make them feel?”
If your answer is, for example, ‘defensive’, then ask yourself:
- Was that my intention?
- Was I emotionally charged as I was speaking?
- If yes, ask; what was I really feeling before I started to speak?
Recognize the emotion. “I was angry”
- What was I really angry about? (get to the point of finding the true trigger based on your beliefs about who you are in this world) “I was angry because I always need to prove to everyone that I am not smart”
- What is it about not being smart that makes me angry?
- Where do I feel not smart?
- When in my life did I first start to believe that I was not smart?
- So, as I spoke up today, did I really speak about the issue at hand or did I simply react from an emotional place of feeling not smart?
When you go within and dig deep at your own emotions around triggers, your beliefs of being ‘less than’ start to emerge and you begin to see some patterns around your reactions. To exercise personal power you need to identify your belief of being “less than,” then ask yourself if it is true and you will see that these are beliefs of the past. Now ask yourself where you are “enough.” By doing this you can stand in your personal power of being “enough.”
When do you find yourself reacting/speaking from an emotional Place?
Do you feel empowered when you speak in that way?
To receive support in growing your self-confidence and personal power, please contact Therapy With Carol now.